Tuesday 5/10

Here’s a clue for you all (and no, it’s not “The Walrus was Paul”).
The Tuesday night B ride is not a training ride for all you racers or racer wannabees.
That’s the A ride.
(yes, I know I’ve been as guilty of this as anyone).
And things tend to work better in a group ride if the fast guys don’t spend all night at the front setting a pace that not everyone in the group can maintain (yes, I’ve been guilty of this as well). There’s something wrong with the pace when long time riders who are fit are getting dropped out of sight from the rest of the group because of the testosterone up front.
Again, A ride.
One more helpful hint to make things more efficient and less stoppage. Short pulls (< two minutes at the front), pull off to your left, let the group pass by, latch onto the back, rinse and repeat.
Again, short pulls, pull off to your left, let the group pass you by, latch onto the back, again and again and again.
If you get stuck behind someone's behind you don't particulary care for, physically or olfactory, then pull off, fall to the back again until you find the right ass for you. I know you all want to ride behind ME, but there's only one of me to go around, so you'll have to work it out amoung the pelaton who the lucky rider is. Maybe you can take turns each week, I don't care as long as it isn't Daren, he worries me with that pink saddle of his.

Anyway, the epiphany came to me last night (after almost 2 years of trying to make this ride as fast as possible), that’s it’s a group ride, not a race.
I don’t know why it took me so long to get it.
I suppose I'll start treating it like a group ride and help those in the back instead of going for the tuesday night hero status.
The stats I have from last nights ride (from another rider):
34.7 miles
102 minutes or thereabout.
20.1 average (felt faster)

Things started out bad and got worse.
I was on the front going up Prospect St. It’s usually Big Dave’s job to set the pace going up this street but he wasn't there so I was left to do his job and I had no clue what I was doing but I was apparently going too fast and drop one or two before the top of the hill.
Mea Culpa.
I think we pulled it back together when we got to the golf center, and again as we turned onto 70.
You all know Tattoo Dave, well we had Cat2 Greg (get it? Tattoo, Cat2? Clever, huh?) on last night’s ride giving us great entertainment as we were all struggling to keep our HR out of the red while he was cracking Cat 2 jokes for the 4 miles to Rt. 117. Unfortunately he’s non stop and my brain can only retain so much, I forgot most of what he said.
The one I did remember was “Surges in the pace are the price we pay for other’s mistakes”.
How apropos for last night’s ride.
Rode down 117 to Langden and then a left leading across 70.
I think we’re missing a rider or 2.
Regroup, head over towards the 6 corners, take a left on 110 and head out towards Bolton, staying right at the fork and heading up to the high school. I hate this route, it’s not terribly long, but it gets tough once we come up on the ball park and gets worse all the way to the top at 117.
When we reached 117 is where I realized things weren’t working well.
And I knew they weren’t going to get better as we headed towards Harvard.
And they didn’t.
Decision time, try and hang on with the fast guys, or fall off and help those who’ve fallen off.
I chose option B. Let the rest of the group continue their pseudo A ride.
Worked in the back as we climbed up into Harvard.
Mike slowed up and waited to join.
We rode to the intersection of Green and Harvard where the group was waiting.
Before riding off again.
Regrouped again in Harvard.
Before the group rode off again.
Regrouped at 110, turned and headed toward the rotary and then off to Devens.
This is what confused me most about last night.
We were together (at least I think we were). It was flat. I think we had a tail wind.
And we were going slow all the way into Devens before taking the left onto Patton Rd heading by the golf course.
Things got heated up a little bit going up one of the hills before regrouping and then heading towards Shirley.
Regrouped again in Shirley and then the entire group rode right and headed towards Keating.
Some attacks on the hill up to Keating, I think Billy Baggins took the sprint points on that one.
Cat2 Greg let it go, biding his time, and then somewhere around Powell he whispered in my ear “this is how it’s done”, the attack was launched and he was gone and I was left wiping Cat2 Greg’s spit off my ear.
Rode back to the shop.
The consensus in the parking lot was the ride sucked.
Maybe things will go better with more riders.

Tuesday 5/3

Another Tuesday night ride, another Tuesday night without any sleep.
For whatever reason I can’t get the HR back down after the ride.
No matter how many beers and benzodiazepines I take after the ride I can't get to sleep.
Maybe some yoga.
Or maybe another valium!
Wednesdays are beginning to be a very unproductive work day for me, and the season has just started. Hopefully this problem goes away.
Or maybe I can work at the shop every wednesday and take power naps in Daren’s new office.

Tuesday night and there were lots of rumors and accusations flying throughout the Peloton.
An anonymous source was cited as claiming one of the riders in the group was doping. At this time it’s nothing more than an unsubstantiated rumor, but said rider was pulling like a beast all night long. I’m not at liberty to drop names until the A and B samples come back from the lab, but the story will eventually come out in Velonews. But I can say HE riders a red Specialized S-Works, a red Bicycle Stop cycling kit (Michigan City Indiana), and sports a nice pair of white Mavic cycling shoes.
I was able to get a short rebuttal from the said doper and he told me it’s nothing more than jealously from the French riders and in the end he will be exonerated of all charges.
And I believe him.

The other talk flying around the Peloton was around Daren’s pink saddle. Would any self respecting member of the male species really ride a pink (of as Andi said, more of a fuchsia color).
Regardless, there was a lot of speculation about a man that rides a pink/ fuchsia saddle.
I checked the ultimate source of all information (Wikipedia) and I think I found the answer,
Metrosexual:
The term originated in an article by Mark Simpson[2] published on November 15, 1994, in The Independent. Simpson wrote:
Metrosexual man, a young straight man with a high disposable income, living or working in the city (because a bustling metropolis like Fitchburg is where all the best clothing and barber shops are), is perhaps the most promising consumer market of the decade. In the Eighties and Nineties he was only to be found inside fashion magazines such as GQ and Vogue, in television advertisements for Levi's jeans or in gay bars. In the 2000’s, he’s everywhere and he’s going shopping for everything from pink/ fuchsia bike saddles to a pair of fine Italian tasseled loafers, to the best Dominican barber shops for that perfectly coiffed hair cut.
Oh well, you gotta give a guy credit for having the fortitude to ride a pink/fuchsia saddle on the Tuesday night ride. (Yeah, I know, it was a Fiz:k demo saddle – the guy gets to demo all the best stuff, but I’m next on the list to demo those Profile Design aero wheels he’s been rolling on for the last couple of weeks).
But enough about Daren, onto the ride!
So my Garmin crapped the bed and I needed to rely on John C’s and Tyler’s numbers for the ride numbers.
Miles: 37.5
Avg. Speed 20.5
So that would make our time somewhere around 110 minutes, or 1:50.

Daren picked the perfect route for our ride. I call it going around the reservoir backwards, since most of my rides around the reservoir go the opposite direction.
So we headed out of the shop, about a 15 minute warm-up before we hit the climb up Pleasant St. It wasn’t so bad at the bottom, and for a couple of minutes I actually had this delusion that my fitness was better than I though.
And then the climb kept going.
And going.
And going.
And then it gets a little steeper.
I wanted the king of the mountain points, but there were 2 riders well up the road. Nonetheless I had hopes of bagging points for 3rd place.
I was paying attention to shadows, especially the one looming just behind me.
I couldn’t look back to see who it was lest the person think I was giving him “The Look”, but I don’t have all the advantages Lance had when he was racing and I didn’t want to embarrass myself so I just watched the shadow get larger and larger.
Push it harder if you want the points, but I couldn’t, all I could feel was the lights going out.
And then it happened, the shadow moved up next to me.
And then past me.
And then up the road finishing the climb a good 10 bike lengths ahead of me.
Nice work John C.
At the Farm Natalie asked if she was just out of shape, or if it was exceptionally hard last night.
It was hard!

We regrouped at the top of N. Row.
And then we headed down N. Row.
All I can say is anyone doing the Sterling RR this weekend is in for a treat. Apparently Sterling got some Stimulus Money to fix that road. After 5 years of suffering the 3-4 mile stretch of bad pavement, it was like a dream (more like one of those Raquel Welch/ Charlie’s Angels dreams I had as a kid…. BTW, Cheryl Ladd, not Farrah was the best Angel). That road was smooth and FAST!
And where I had my first nit of the night with Billy (Frodo) Baggins – he was up the road in between myself and the 2 guys off the front. I was able to bridge up to Frodo, completely out of gas hoping to work with him to bridge up to the other 2 riders, as soon as I got within a bike length of him Frodo decides to drill it and drop me!
Dude, if you’re racing Sterling this weekend, do yourself a favor and take some help bridging up to the guys up the road. It’s easier if you have help than to try going it alone.
There are guys who go it alone (read Fabian Cancellara).
And then there’s the rest of us.
Nuff said.

No stopping as we turned onto Rt. 12.
Edit: (I thought we were all together, but Charlie later told me there was a group that fell slightly off and once you’re slightly off you’re all the way off - sorry!)
Daren noticed things were about to break up when some of the riders fell slightly off. He encouraged them not to fall off, but once a small gap opens on that stretch of 12 it’s very difficult to close it down.
Adding to the breakage was a mechanical where one rider lost his light (I think) and some riders stopped to help him find it.
So it was a group of about 10, I’d like to say we were all taking our turns at the front, but truth be told Tom Stevens was the locomotive pulling the train for 3-5 minutes at a time.
Other’s took their turns.
And then the alleged doper was at the front….. drilling it.
I was behind him, I enjoyed the shelter much more than I do riding behind Nat, Daren and a couple of others who can make themselves real small. But Ed (ooops, I wasn’t supposed to leak names) was killing it. And I was suffering like hell trying to hold on.
Ed bailed at the bottom of the Rt. 12 hill, but no matter his job was done pulling us up to it.
And then I was on the front.
I wanted the KOM points I missed on Pleasant St.
I needed a distraction from the pain of the lactate acid, burning lungs and the heart attack I could feel coming on. And this isn’t even a real hill, but it is where the attacks come on fast and furious.
So as a distraction I started counting frost heaves.
I could do this.
1, 2, 5, 7 frost heaves.
Getting closer to the top, but there was still a long way to go.
I think I made it ½ way to the top.
And then 1, 2, 5, 7 riders swallowed me up and spit me out the back like I was sitting still.
Oh well no KOM jersey for me, time to sit up and conserve the energy before the regroup at the West Boylston package store.
After the regroup things calmed down, a little bit, as we headed up 12 to 140 before making our way towards Boylston.
Everything was going well.
I made it over the bad RR tracks without having to walk my bike over them.
Faster and faster as we had the slight downhill and a wicked tail wind leading to the town line, it was awesome!
And then it suddenly came to an end.
“Flat!”
Damn!
Turned back, rider EC was already checking Folsom’s wheel while Folsom was picking through his saddle bag for the tools to fix it. Mike the mechanic holding the bike giving the tips he’s learned over the years, Duncan trying to get some air into the tube with his frame pump, but I think Duncan might want to purchase a new pump, that thing has seen it’s better days. Ed took over, blew some air into the tube, got it on the rim, a quick check and everything seemed to be in order.
And then we were off where we met the group at the base of 70.
Once we rolled out, as Natalie predicted back in Sterling, things were going to get real fast on the other side of the pond when we’d have a tail wind to push us along, and as sure as the sun rises in the east things got really fast to the point where I think we set a Tuesday night time record making it from one end of 70 all the way to the meet up point in Clinton.
There was a point when things were getting really heated – riders hanging on by a thread as the strong guys (Re’ Davis, Tom and Ed) set the pace, but our group of about 5 or 6 were still together.
And then an unnamed rider on a blue and silver Trek 2300 committed the cardinal sin of letting a gap open without giving notice to the rider behind him that he was going to drop.
Fortunately the group leader was paying attention. But it was too late, the leaders were about to drop the rest of us.
Or were they?
The ride leader was obviously perturbed at this rookie mistake. To put it another way he was pissed.
I was in world of pain watching this unfold when suddenly the voices of Phil Ligget and Paul Sherwin began going through my head,
“I can’t believe it Paul, never before do I recall ever seen a rider turn the pedals in such anger”
“Phil, you’re absolutely right, the team leader is obviously not happy over the gap that’s opened up in front of him, I think he just called the rider an f’en something or other as he blew by him. It’s almost as if he’s trying his hardest to rip the cranks right off his bike”
“Right you are Paul, this has to be the most amazing demonstration of pure power I think I have ever seen. And as you well know I’ve seen it all, having been around this sport since Major Taylor was winning track races back in the 20’s.
“Yes Phil, I think everyone would agree that you are just about the oldest person alive today”
“But enough about my age, what this rider just did was truly remarkable, perhaps one of the strongest moves I’ve ever seen in my 87 years of covering this sport – he completely shut that gap down and pulled the riders behind him right up to the lead group.
And so on and so on, Phil and Paul are like a bad song, once they get in my head I can’t get them out. And thanks to Daren’s hard work our group was able to stay together all the way to the meet up in Clinton.

After regrouping, the hero of the B Ride decided to go down Clinton Main St. to the 8 corners in Lancaster.
It seemed like a good idea.
But really it wasn’t.
It’s spring and they were draining every fire hydrant on Main St.
All I could think of was why did I take those fenders off?
Big Dave was the smart one, riding up front and staying dry (and clean).
The rest of us got showered.
And to think I just washed my kit this weekend. And I was especially proud of how white my PI Arm Warmers came out.
Now I’m going to have to rewash the kit for the second time in a week.
Everything calmed down as we headed to rt. 70 in Lancaster.
We all knew what was coming up.
I’m pretty sure things were together as we took the right onto 70.
The pace was manageable.
For about the first mile.
And then it picked up.
And finally someone made the move and it was game on.
The paceline formed and we were off.
Faster and faster, and for the first time since I can remember we actually had what felt like a tailwind.
One by one riders took their turn on the front.
And then the Bicycle Ally rider was in front of me, going down the dip in the road before the uphill.
He flicked off at the bottom.
I was pissed – “don’t bail at the bottom!”
And then he schooled me.
“But you have the momentum and the fresh legs to keep the pace going.
Lesson learned – flicking off at the bottom of a hill isn’t always a bad thing when you have riders behind you.
It was actually easy keeping the pace on the up hill..
Bailed off shortly after the top and then let the group do their work, watched the riders pass me (of course Charlie was right in the middle of all the action, I still don’t know how he does it, he tries having me believe he’s still trying to get his form back, but he’s already there).
I caught the last rider and latched back on to the back.
Somewhere along the way I ended up back on the front.
With a problem.
There was a lone rider (maybe another victim of the A Ride) and I didn’t know whether to go left or right, I stressed too much about what to do and forgot to signal the riders behind me and completely messed things up.
Fortunately we all managed to recover from my mistake and the paceline reformed as we ended the Rt. 70 sprint in a bunch finish.
The ride kept going pretty hard, there were a couple riders off the front, they made the light at the shopping center.
I was never so glad to catch the red light. Several of us waited and recovered before those last two climbs up to Prospect St. Those 2 little hills always seem to hurt the most.
Everyone taking flyers down Prospect St.
And before we knew what happened, we found ourselves with the A ride. Unbelievable, we managed to chase down the A ride!
It didn’t matter that they had 5 extra miles on us.

All in all another great night of riding.

*I forgot to mention Duncan was back on the ride and riding out in the wind as strong as ever. I learned from him that it’s his training technique, getting stronger by not drafting. And the steel framed Huffy is looking as good as ever.
**and to set the record straight on the guy riding the red Specialized, the doping comments were all in jest – it appears you’ve been doing a lot of hard work during the off season. Rider of the night award!!!!